


Step by step

by adamparrsh



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Adam Parrish Loves Ronan Lynch, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dogs, M/M, Marriage Proposal, More fluff than angst, because that tag needed to be made, henry isn't in this but he's a critical character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-30
Updated: 2017-08-30
Packaged: 2018-12-21 21:45:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11953266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adamparrsh/pseuds/adamparrsh
Summary: They fight, they make up, and Ronan has a confesion to make.They also talk about dogs.





	Step by step

**Author's Note:**

> For some reason I always end up writing something when the Pynch tag is dead. Before you start reading here's a few things for your consideration:
> 
> 1- English isn't my first language so this might be shit, sorry for any mistakes!
> 
> 2- There's an unconventional take on what the Barns mean to Ronan. 
> 
> 3- I'm still new at this fic writing thing so, again, sorry if this sucks!!! 
> 
> Hope you like it.

Opal was tugging insistenly at his hand, trying to make him stand.

"Go talk to him" she said, for the seventh time in five minutes.

"Why? He doesn't listen." Adam responded. He was sitting on the couch at the living room, frowning at the ceiling not bothering to hide how annoyed he still was.

"Neither of you do! He talked to me about it before" Opal said. 

"About what?" Adam asked her, surprised.

"About what he'd like to do after you finish college!" she said, finally dropping his hand and crossing her arms, mimicking Adam's expression from earlier.

"What did he say?" Adam asked.

"Ask him! He didn't talk to you about it cause he's nervous" Opal said, and stormed out of the room. Adam sometimes forgot that she wasn't the little girl he met five years ago anymore, probably because she still looked the same physically. 

Adam followed her with his eyes until she disappeared upstairs. A pang of guilt surged on his chest after knowing their stupid fight was the reason she was upset.

It had been like that for a long time: they would yell at each other, Opal would listen, watch them fight until one of them left, and then she would play mediator and make them apologize. It was a good system. 

It wouldn't work today. 

It had been months since they had a fight like this, and even then it wasn't as big as this one. Adam liked to think they were better at communicating than they were at the beginning of their relationship. Now however, if Adam had known this was what he would come home to after a long fucking drive he would have stayed at his aparment and study for his last exams, even if they were months away. For some reason their most recent fights were always about the future, about what would happen after Adam graduated, when they'd see each other. 

Today, both of them thought it would be a good idea to finally stop ignoring the subject. It was Ronan who started the conversation by asking him how the job interview went. 

It was Adam who made the mistake of telling him it went great, but he rejected it because of how far away it was. Then Ronan snapped and told him how stupid that was, then Adam snapped and told him that it was his decision to make not Ronan's, then they kept yelling at each other as they usually did.

"It's not only about you!" was the last thing Ronan shouted before leaving the house, slamming every door he could reach and leaving Adam both angry and confused.

That had been half an hour ago. Now, Adam was all alone in the living room, trying to figure out what it was Ronan and Opal talked about. If he had plans why was he so nervous about telling Adam? Adam thought they were past the point where they would hide things from each other. 

Adam tried to distract himself turning the TV on, changing chanels without even looking. Where was Ronan now? Adam knew he wasn't very far since he didn't hear Ronan's car leaving. Maybe he was in one of the barns, but it was too late to go down there right now. 

"Whatever" Adam whispered to the silence of the room, turned off the tv and went in search for Ronan. 

He found him in the first place he searched. Ronan was sitting in the porch steps, back against one of the pillars. He acknowledged Adam's presence with a short glance and went back to staring at the field, the fireflies in the distance acting like little stars. He looked peaceful, but Adam knew better. 

"Hey" Adam said, sitting on the opposite side of the step. Ronan looked at him for a second as an answer, before he sighed and closed his eyes.

They sat in silence for a while, Adam didn't know how much time had passed when Ronan finally said something. 

"You should have taken it" Ronan said, looking at Adam, with what Adam thought was a resigned look. 

"I didn't want it" Adam said, looking away.  
Ronan huffed. 

"Yes you did, Adam. I fucking know you did and you know it too" Ronan said. 

Adam turned to look at him, he could feel anger raise inside him again and tried to stop himself from snapping at Ronan again. It was about time they learned to talk about this without one of them leaving. Adam did want the job, but not if it mean being so far away. 

"I did want the job" Adam said, "but not that one. I'm sure there'll be more offers that aren't in another state six hours away from here" 

"Fuck" Ronan mumbled, he covered his own face with his hands after that and shook his head, his hair going every direction.

"Can you tell me what is wrong with you?" Adam said, "why are you acting like this? It's just a job, Ronan. I haven't even graduated yet, I'll get one when I have the actual title" 

"It's not about that" Ronan said into his hands before taking them away, he looked like he was trying really hard to say something. 

"Then what is it?" Adam said, lowering his voice without meaning to. Ronan just looked at him. "is it about what you and Opal talked about?" 

"What did she said?" Ronan said, frowning.

"Just that you talked about what you wanted to do after graduation" Adam said. 

"I'll never know how she catches up to these things so quickly" Ronan said, after a light snort.

"Me either" Adam smiled, looking away from Ronan at the fields. Sometimes Opal knew them more that they knew themselves, more than they knew each other. Adam couldn't decide if it was amazing or terrifying. He'll go with the first one. "So? what was it?"

Ronan's expression went from amusement to something like determination. Like he'd finally decided to do something that's been bothering him for a while. He took a deep breathe and looked at Adam. 

"I want to move" he said. 

That was the last thing Adam expected to come from Ronan's mouth right now. 

"What?" Adam said. 

"I want to move, I want us to leave the Barns and get a house of our own" Ronan said. 

"Bu-" but why? this is your home Adam wanted to said but Ronan interrupted him.

"Before you say anything I'm sure about this, and I thought about it for a while now. I mentioned it to the gremlin before thinking about it too much in case she didn't want to but she does." he said quickly, like he was trying to get it over with. "what do you say?" 

"I... were you nervous about telling me that?" Adam said incredulous. 

"I don't know. What the fuck Parrish, is that the first thing you're going to say?" Ronan said. 

"I mean Opal said you didn't tell me before because you were nervous" Adam said. 

"Pff, I wasn't nervous. I just didn't know how to tell you" Ronan said, after a moment he added "big life decisions and shit" 

"I know you said you thought about it but... this is your home Ronan, you fought for this place" Adam said, looking around as if he was just realising that now. He had gotten so used to calling this place home as well. 

"I know" Ronan took another deep breath and took his eyes away from Adam, "I don't regret any of that, I really wanted this place back, this is where I grew up" 

Ronan was making such a big effort to speak about this that Adam almost wanted to stop him and tell him he knew, but he also knew that Ronan needed to let it out. He moved closer instead and linked their hands. 

"It's not the same anymore, it wasn't the same five years ago, it wasn't the same all those nights when you were away and I had the whole house to myself and Opal." Ronan was still looking away at the fields, Adam moved closer to rest his head against Ronan's shoulder. He was silent for a short while after that until he said, in what was almost a whisper "I'm not saying it was bad, just not the same. We made some fucking great memories here in the last years too, I wouldn't change that."

"Mhm, we made out for the first time against this thing" Adam said, pointing at the pillar behind them. Ronan smiled and looked at him.

"That was a good kiss" Ronan said, moving to rest his forhead against Adam's. "I had no idea what I was doing" 

"I could tell" Adam said, and rubbed Ronan's nose with his own "you were a terrible kisser" 

"Shut the fuck up I wasn't" Ronan said outraged. Adam laughed and pecked his lips "and even if I was that didn't stop you from kissing me" 

"Well, someone had to teach you" Adam said still smiling. 

"Fuck you" Ronan said, kissing him one more time. He pulled away and smiled against Adam's lips, "these are also the steps Cheng threw up in that one time" 

"Oh my god" Adam said, moving closer to Ronan, as if trying to move away from vomit that was long gone. Ronan laughed and threw his arm around Adam's shoulder "I almost forgot about that, it was when he and Blue wanted to see who could get drunk faster." 

"I didn't know Sargent had it in her to win that" Ronan said. 

"Remember when we were woken up by a loud noise at like 6am one day and we found Opal trying to drag a whole tree inside?" Adam said, smiling at the memory. They had found her and the tree in this same steps. Ronan smiled too. 

"How the fuck did she cut that big ass tree?" Ronan asked, frowning. 

"No idea" Adam said. There were a million memories like that one to reminisce on, all linked to the Barns. So that's what they did for a while, laughing or smiling fondly, until they couldn't remember anymore stories. "are we good? about our fight"

"Yeah, I was more pissed at myself than at you, I should have tell you sooner" Ronan said. "Maybe if you knew that I wanted to move you would have taken the job" 

"Lynch" Adam started, "I said I didn't want it" 

"I just don't want you to limit your opportunities because of me, because of what they would do to our relationship. You worked really hard for them" Ronan said.

"That was an extremly mature comment, who are you and what have you done with my boyfriend?" Adam said. Ronan rolled his eyes fighting back a smile. Adam kissed his cheek. "I didn't take that job because it was in another state and I didn't want to be away from you after being away for four years. You don't limit my opportunities, they're not real opportunities if you and Opal don't fit into the equation." 

Ronan looked at him for a while, Adam looked back. 

"That was really cheesy" Ronan said. Adam rolled his eyes and pushed him away, making Ronan laugh.

"Idiot" Adam said, while Ronan brought him closer to his side again, placing a kiss on the top of his head. They stayed like that for a long while, both submerged in their own thoughts. They still had a lot to talk about. "so... you want to move"

"Yeah, but don't worry about it too much I was thinking we could do it after you graduate" Ronan said. 

"Are you sure you want this?" Adam asked after a beat. He needed to know. There still was a part of Adam that knew Ronan would want to do this just because he thought it would make Adam happy.

"I am" Ronan said, "and I know what you're thinking. I said it wasn't only about you and I meant it. I want this Adam, I love this place and always will. It's filled with memories of my childhood, of my parents, my brothers, you, Opal, our friends. But it's also filled with some fucked up memories that I keep thinking about even when I try not to..." 

"Ronan" Adam started, that was a wound Adam didn't mean to open, but Ronan kept talking. 

"This is my house, but it was my parents' house first. I cook in the same kitchen my parents cooked in, I use the same bathroom, fuck I can't even walk past their bedroom Adam" Ronan's voice was only above a whisper when he stopped talking. Adam took his hand again, kissing the back of it. 

"Hey, it's okay" Adam said, "I know" 

"Living here was healing, it helped me remember them. That's why I think I need to leave now, I want this place to be theirs, I want to come back here to remember them. I want to have a separate life from this place, Adam. Fuck, I don't want to spend my whole life grieving them, and that's what I do whenever I see something that was theirs everyday" Ronan said. Adam didn't know what to say, he kept holding his hand and listening. "And I know I'll probably grieve them my whole life anyway, but maybe one day in the future I'll come back here and smile thinking about them, instead of feeling like shit, like Matthew or Declan do." 

Adam was left speechless, because he wasn't expecting any of this. This was the most Ronan talked about it since his mom died, Adam knew Ronan still grieved their lost everyday. He couldn't have realised that he was feeling like this, though. He did the only thing he knew would work, he reached for Ronan and huged him. They stayed like that for what felt like hours, Adam alternating between rubbing circles in Ronan's back or caressing his hair. Ronan breathing into Adam's neck, trying to control his fast beating heart. Ronan was the first to break the silence. 

"This isn't my home anymore, it used to be a long time ago but now it's just my house. It only feels like home when you're in it, and I know that's not because of this place." Ronan said, Adam kept rubbing circles in his back. "I could move whatever the fuck you want with you and it'd still be home" 

"Now who's being cheesy?" Adam said, trying to ease the mood. Ronan pulled away to glare at him. Adam smiled, moving closer to Ronan again "You are my home, too" 

"Good" Ronan said, "I want to go whatever you want, whether it's one, five or seven states away. Fuck we can move to another country if that's what you want" 

Adam didn't want to move to another country. But, Ronan was willing to leave Henrietta to follow Adam wherever he wanted, and the thought itself filled Adam's heart with a love so pure and honest that Adam from six years ago wouldn't've believed existed. 

"I love you" Adam whispered into Ronan's neck, letting Ronan wrap his arms around him, "a lot" 

"Me too" Ronan said, kissing his forehead. 

"We can decide together, though. I'll go whatever you want, too" Adam said. 

"You're the one who always wanted to leave this place. Think about somewhere you always wanted to go and we'll go there" Ronan said. 

"Anywhere but here" Adam said, he added "I do want to be close to our friends though"

"So, New York?" Ronan said. 

"I'd like that" Adam smiled.

"I want us to have a big ass house, with a big ass backyard with trees and shit for Opal" Ronan said.

Adam found it hard to believe how easy Ronan talked about them as if they were one. He talked about Adam and Opal as if they were already a family, only after four years of being together. Not living together after Adam's graduation wasn't an option in Ronan's mind. As he thought about it, it wasn't an option in his either. As he thought about it, Ronan and Opal were the only family Adam ever wanted, he had no doubts about that. 

"Will we have dogs?" Adam asked, pulling away from Ronan to look him in the eyes. "We need at least five"

"Five?" Ronan asked, arching his eyebrows, "why so many dogs?" 

"There's no such thing as many dogs, Lynch" Adam said, glaring at him. 

"Alright calm down Cesar Millán" Ronan said, "we'll have your five dogs" 

Adam beamed, and moved to closer to Ronan again. 

"Okay so, to sum it up, it can be in New York, we'll have trees" Ronan said, counting with his fingers "a big backyard, a barbecue" 

"Why a barbecue?" Adam asked confused. They never used the barbacue. 

"I don't know people have barbacues" Ronan said, as if that was a valid reason. 

"Right" Adam said, after that Ronan kept counting things they would definitely not need in their house for a longer while. Adam interrupted, "don't forget our dogs."

"Jesus fuck, Parrish. Yes, we'll have dogs" Ronan said, offering him an exasperated smile. Adam was so enamored by that smile that he forgot what they were talking about in the first place. "Only if you let me name them" 

"Yeah that'd be great" Adam said, still lost in Ronan's smile. He had no idea what Ronan'd said. Adam was even more in love with him when he laughed, like now.

"What? Are you sure?" Ronan asked, searching for Adam's eyes so he'd stopped looking at his smile.

"Yes" Adam said and kissed him. It had been a full month since they saw each other before tonight, Adam had missed him so much. He couldn't believe he even thought staying in his aparment hours away was going to be better than this. Only because of a stupid fight. 

Adam deepened the kiss by moving closer into Ronan's lap, linking his hands in the back of Ronan's neck. Ronan's hands found their way into Adam's waist and pulled him closer to him, kissing him deeper. Adam didn't know what time it was, or how long they had been outside, talking, planning the future, kissing. It wasn't until they heard the front door open that they pulled away. 

Opal stood there observing them, like she was about to put them on time out. 

"It's past midnight" she said, frowning at them. 

"Why are you still up then?" Ronan asked, turning to look at her and mimic her expression. Adam hid his smile on Ronan's neck. 

"Because you fought! You've been outside for hours" Opal said. 

"Sorry Opal, we're good now. We're sorry we didn't tell you" Adam said. 

"Hey brat, Parrish just said that he'll let me name our dogs" Ronan told her. Opal's eyes widened. 

"Why would you do that?" she asked Adam. 

"I didn't say such thing" Adam said, feinging confusion.

"What the fuck Parrish? you literally just did" Ronan huffed. 

"I wouldn't say that in a million years" Adam said. "I won't let you corrupt our puppies with your awful pet naming skills" 

"I'll make the puppies like me more so they only respond to the names I give them" Ronan said.

"I'll break up with you if you do that" Adam crossed his arms. Ronan smiled, sliding his hands around Adam's waist. 

"Try me" Ronan said. 

"Shut up, you're not naming our dogs" Adam said, "Opal and I will, right Opal?" 

"Yes!" Opal nodded excitedly, "they'll be called Tree and Grass, or Flower and Branches" 

Ronan barked out a laugh at the same time Adam smiled awkwardly at Opal. 

"Um.. yeah those are nice! Maybe think of others?" Adam said, trying to be polite. He'd take Ronan's names over those anytime. Opal shrugged and ran inside again. Probably heading for her bedroom. "Stop laughing, you idiot" 

"Your face when you heard her options" Ronan laughed, "what did you expect?" 

"I don't know! I should have known she was just like you" Adam said, uncrossing his arms, bringing them to Ronan's shoulders again. Ronan stopped laughing eventually, his expression turning thoughtful.

"I still can't believe she knew the real reason I snapped at you and I didn't" Ronan said. 

"She's good at reading people" Adam said, "or just you" 

"The little hooved Freud" Ronan said. Adam laughed. 

"That was so bad" Adam said, still laughing. 

"You're still laughing dumbass" Ronan said, smiling up at him. Adam swatted at his shoulder playfully. Ronan kissed his cheek. 

"Should we go inside?" Adam asked. He wasn't tired but it was late. Ronan stood up. Adam followed him, he went up the stairs to go inside but was stopped by Ronan grabbing his hand.

"Nah, let's stay here" Ronan said, he was leaning against the porch pillar, Adam smiled as Ronan pulled him into him by his belt loops.

"You're trying to recreate that kiss?" Adam asked smiling, and placed his hands against Ronan's chest, playing with the straps of his hoodie. 

"Maybe" Ronan said, pulling Adam closer. They kissed like that again, Adam feeling the kiss everywhere. He pulled away a couple seconds later. 

"Nope, still a terrible kisser" Adam said, obviously teasing. The original kiss was in Adam's top five of best kisses, he'll never say that to Ronan, though. Ronan probably knew anyway. 

"Still a terrible liar" Ronan said, smiling against his mouth, and kissed him again. 

"A porch" Adam said, pulling away a minute later.

"What?" Ronan said. 

"In our new house! We'll need a porch, it has to have one of this things to make out against" Adam said.

"Noted" Ronan said. "what would our soccer moms neighbours say if they saw us making out against it though?" 

"They'll mind their own business, besides they'll be distracted by how cute our dogs will be" Adam said. 

"I'll befriend them first, maybe we can exchange recipes and shit and I'll cook them for when you get home from work" Ronan said, his expression went from playful to what almost looked serious "I can be your stay-at-home husband" 

Adam's heart skipped a beat. 

"Husband?" Adam said, arching his eyebrows. 

"Yeah" Ronan said, smiling. He let go of Adam. "wait here" 

He ran inside then, leaving a confused Adam outside. He came back a minute later, out of breath and with something in his hand. He stopped in front of Adam to catch his breath, Adam would have laughed if he wasn't so confused. 

"Okay, I wasn't going to do this today, I actually was planning a huge fucking thing that involved flowers and shit but fuck it" Ronan said, and got down on one knee. "Parrish, will you marry me?" 

Of all the ways this night could have ended this was the last thing Adam expected. He had imagined this moment an embarassing amount of times, he had imagine Ronan in this position. He had also imagined himself in this position, he had even considered buying a ring once, but he hadn't made the official decision yet. 

Now Ronan was down on one knee in front of him, in a hoodie and jeans, still trying to catch his breath, holding a beautiful ring that Adam was sure belonged to a dream version of himself. And he had the weirdest expression on his face, something between joy and fear, as if he thought Adam saying no was a possibility. 

Adam tried to let the word out.Yes, yes, yes, he kept repeating but nothing was coming. Instead he just nodded once, twice, five times until Ronan placed the ring in his finger and he finally stood up and kissed him. Adam kissed him once, twice, five times until Ronan was laughing against his mouth, and then he was as well. 

"Yes, I'll marry you" Adam said, when he finally found his voice. He had his arms around Ronan's neck, Ronan's arms around his waist. 

"Good" Ronan said, and kissed him "I love you so fucking much" 

"I love you, too" Adam smiled against Ronan's mouth. He pulled away to look at him one more time. "why now?" 

"I don't know, it felt right" Ronan said, "if we're living together officialy I want it to be as your husband" 

Adam just looked at him, a permanent smile on his face. He didn't know what to say at that, so Ronan kept talking. 

"I want to wait for you with dinner ready, I want to hear your rants about work, I want to give you a fucking foot massage when you're tired" Ronan said, "I want to be your husband" 

"I want that, too" Adam said, "specially the foot massage. You can start today"

Ronan rolled his eyes. 

"I should've known you only wanted me for that" Ronan said. Adam laughed.

"I'm joking, you don't need to do any of that. What about farming?" Adam asked. 

"We'll still have the barns, we could come here on the weekends or whatever. Maybe we could get a place big enough for some animals" Ronan said, "other than the dogs" 

"A cow?" Adam said.

"Nah, maybe some chickens" Ronan said.

"The soccer moms would freak out" Adam said. Ronan laughed.

"They'll like the chickens when we give them free eggs" Ronan said. "Don't worry about me, I'll figure out what I'll do when we get to that point" 

"Okay" Adam said. Adam trusted Ronan, he trusted that Ronan was doing this because he truly wanted to. He trusted in their relationship enough to know that they'd find a way out together if any of this failed. As for now, Adam locked his arms around Ronan once more and kissed him.  
They kissed until Ronan pulled away to catch his breath. He rested his forhead against Adam's, a permanent smile on his face too. 

"I can't believe we got engaged in the same steps Henry threw up in" Adam said laughing. Ronan joined him. 

"He'd be honored when we tell him" Ronan said. 

They stayed outside wrapped in each other for a short while after that, both in comfortable silence. When they finally moved inside, Adam couldn't help thinking that this will be another memory about those steps to reminisce on in the future.

Now, as Ronan guided him inside by the hand, a newly placed ring in it, Adam let the love for the man next to him and the excitement for their future together overcome him. 

They had the rest of their lives to make new memories.


End file.
